Hanukkah

Classic Blue Star Hanukkah

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Life then Peace

If we desire to live we must fight for peace, because it will not be handed to us without resistance. I greatly admire Dr. King and the battle that he fought in his life for civil liberties; I believe that he was fighting for a cause that should be extended to all. Good and evil exist in our world today and that evil will not back down without being berated into submission, their goal is to annihilate and not to negotiate. Our war today is more than just that of wanting to live in harmony with human kind, I believe that most desire to live in peace but we must fight so that we may live. Our enemy has come into our land and will stop at nothing to destroy us; our very existence comes before the existence of peace.

Though I Walk Through the Valley...

So the time has come again for David to leave. It seems that it should be easier now, this being our third deployment, but somehow it isn't. I've come to find myself in the same chasm of emotions before he leaves. I was alright with it, knowing time will pass quickly with school, work and then before i know it he would be home. But today, i felt like i was falling into a great space of loneliness. where i feel that I'm all alone, and the depth of the emotion is so strong. almost like a wave, you can't stop it, you just have to wait for it to pass over you. always waiting for that little lull of peace before the next wave hits.

I know that this all will pass and that we will come out on the other side, but it is the getting through that requires so much. it's a day to day battle to just keep my chin up and keep pushing on.
I truly believe that without the valleys we could never experience the mountain top, but is that valley that is so dark and seems to last for so long. the more i walk through it, the more familiar i become. the better i can prepare and armor myself in the face of my adversary.

2 Corinthians 1 tells us that trials are for our encouragement and deliverance. and it also reminds us that Yeshua will always be our conquering king; "The one in whom we have placed our hope will indeed continue to rescue us."

Rescue. Peace. Assurance. Praise.

This is my pattern. the praise brings the deliverance, while i give all glory to the Father.

live to be free

So today was my first day of eating gluten free. I have been having really bad stomach aches for almost a year now, off and on, and i am starting to suspect that i have an allergy to gluten.
today i avoided anything made with gluten (wheat and rye flour) or ate things specifically gluten free. my stomach felt so much better. i am waiting on blood work to come back and confirm all of this, so we'll see.

it feels like as soon as one thing ends another starts; about four years ago i was in a bad car accident and injured my neck and have been in a lot of pain ever since. since May i have been going to a chiropractor, Dr. Zook, and my spine is in such better shape! I have almost no pain in my neck now and don't have to take any medications for it. Praise G-d!
I had a dr. tell me that burning the nerves in my back was my last option, well he was wrong. Seeing x-rays of my spine at Dr. Zook's, my neck was in the shape of an 's'. At my last checkup about a month ago, my spine had moved 4 degrees in one spot and 3 in another back INTO alignment. this is really good!

So as G-d has led me to the right solution for my neck problem, i believe that he can do it again!

Desert Song

32 Nails

I find the most random things to do when I am procrastinating. I mean it isn't like I have had the past two and a half months to do things while David was gone! Now that I find myself with finals to study for, a house to clean before my husband gets home and those oh so random things that I 'was going to get done' still to do. Did I mention that I only have three days? Of which I have material that I am still studying. Some college professors don't seem to find it necessary to teach what is actually on the FINAL.

You must be wondering why on earth I titled this 32 Nails. It is actually part of random procrastination. You see I thought it would be a good idea to put up white lights around the perimeter of our bedroom. It'll create a relaxing ambience right? The stupid nails barely hold the strands of lights up and I almost expect them to come crashing down while I'm sleeping! And yes it took 32 nails to put the crazy things up. What actually started this whole escapade is the taliet from our wedding. I thought it would be nice to hang above our bed. I was hoping that the really neat plant hangers that I found at Lowe's would end up looking like something from HGTV. That wish was not granted. Instead it looks rather, um, well awkward, this thing hanging over our bed. I'll leave it up until David gets home and see what he thinks. Did I mention that you can't even see the hangar things? The taliet totally covers them up. I could have Winnie the Poo hooks for that matter.

Did you know that Kmart has a great sale on candles, table runners and ribbon right now? Seriously, it was not high on the priorities list to actually go to Kmart but I felt like going. That feeling really only means that you are going to spend money that you didn't really need to spend in the first place, but it is justified with the fact that you saved $21. That is some pretty serious savings, seeing that most of what was purchased was 50% off!!!

FYI- after you get married Kmart sales on cute tablecloths and napkins becomes a highlight of your day.
I guess it's the nesting gene, and no Sarah I am not pregnant.

So now that it is officially my bed time I guess I should start studying. They do say that the things you read right before you go to sleep you remember the most. cram! Cram! CRAM! Sleep.

So here is to all of you who ever have or are in the process of procrastinating! Happy studying!

the cost of sacrifice

These are the times where you think you will know everything to say, words of comfort and being able to relate to an experience. However, i have come to the realization that I have no idea what to say to my husband regarding what he has been through these past few months. I don't know where he has been, what he has seen, gone through or felt. I have no knowledge and won't seeing that he isn't allowed to talk about it. In some ways maybe it is best that i don't know the details whether they be good or bad. I just hope that G-d will give me the right words to say when David comes home. Of course there will be the 'I miss you' and 'I love you' but the difference is there won't be the sharing of experiences as usually happens when one is away for any length of time.

I never realized until this morning that silence and not knowing is a sacrifice. I am so thankful that my husband is willing to make this sacrifice and serve to protect our country and the freedom that we believe in so deeply.